Return
by iloveROBWARD
Summary: Bella Swan moved away from Forks in 7th grade because of a boy who made her life hell. Over the course of years, she’s matured into a bad ass and has done things her parents are ashamed of. After the final straw with her mother, she’s forced to move back.
1. Chapter 1

Alright, so this is my new story. I know I told most of you that I wouldn't start until I had finished 'A Miracle' but I have so many ideas for this and can't wait.

So this is the full sneak-peek.

**Bella Swan moved away from Forks in 7****th**** grade because of a boy who made her life hell. Over the course of years, she's matured into a bad ass and has done things her parents are ashamed of. After the final straw with her mother, she's forced to move back to Forks in the house her father left for her after he died. Now that she's 18 and grown-up, living alone but having to go to school, will she be able to get through the day knowing she will see what changed her everyday?**

Chapter 1

I could feel the high off the weed I was smoking take effect. It was nice to be numb, not be able to give a care in the world. I was happy with James and his buddies right now because they helped me grow up and realise what a retarded world we live in is. I looked up to the sky and sighed. What I would give to see Renee's face when she realises I snuck out again.

Renee was my mom. My bitch mom who only cared about her precious little angel, Jane. Also known as my 4-year-old stepsister. Her and Phil and devil child made the perfect family. It made me sick really. I had been living in Forks with Charlie when the 'incident' happened. Ever since, I've moved to Phoenix to live with my mom. It wasn't pretty at first, I started not eating and then cutting myself to forget the pain but that didn't work. I still do sometimes but I mostly escape with James and Laurent to get high off our asses.

James and Laurent. They were what got me through the day. We would jack some money from somewhere; spend on our selves and then on alcohol and drugs. James was 20 years old; he was a school drop out and decided to live this life. Laurent is 18 and decided not to go to college. They both get me my fix for the day and I usually sneak out of the house to get stoned like right now.

You might be thinking, why would you do this? Well here's my story. When I was in elementary, there was a group of people that bullied me. They were the Cullen Gang. They teased me endlessly about being fat, calling me Jelly Belly or making fun of my glasses by knocking me down and picking them up as well as managing to break them. They would follow me around and push me to the floor or laugh excessively at my clumsiness. Then there was middle school. Joy. They would fill my locker with buckets of paint, or worms, anything really and laugh at me when they would get dumped on me. During lunchtime, they would steal my food just to throw it at my face yelling 'FAT ASS' every time. The worst was gym class, Edward Cullen would purposely throw balls or rackets or sticks at me resulting injuries. In the beginning I would cry and they would tease me endlessly about it afterwards. I stop once I realised it could help me. But what finally got me angry was the incident of February 5th. I was in gym class and this time we were playing volleyball. Of course the coach decides to put me in the middle against Edward Cullen's team. It wasn't really a surprise when Cullen smashed the ball in my direction resulting in another pair of broken glasses, a piece of glass being stuck in my skin close to my eye and 4 stitches. But what happened when I was walking back to my locker after school was the last straw. I was walking down a hallway when I heard him speaking with Emmett Cullen, his brother.

_Flashback:_

_  
I was walking down the south hallway towards the 7__th__ grade hallway when I overheard to people laughing. I stopped walking when I realised who they were. Edward and Emmett Cullen.  
''Did you see what I did to her? She's going to have a messed up face for a while. She'll be even more ugly!'' Edward said in between laughs.  
''I know man. You got her good. Plus, she'll get even fatter when everyone makes fun of her because she'll eat too much comfort food. She's so fat too. She'll be alone one day.'' Emmett said.  
''Most likely, or she'll become a prostitute because she'll want attention. I heard from Crowley that she gave Newton a blowjob! What a whore!'' They were full on laughing about me and I had had enough. I was crying by now and started running down the hallway, away from them. Because of my clumsiness, I tripped and smacked my head on the tiled floor, opening up my stitches. I looked up from where I lay, bleeding, to where I ran from to see two green eyes starring sadly back at mine. I got up and started running again, my tears mixing with the blood from my cut._

End flashback.

The second I got home I told Charlie that I wanted to move, that I had enough of Forks. He agreed pretty easily. Once I moved to Phoenix, I stopped eating and started cutting. I have exactly 32 cuts on my right arm and 26 on the left. Renee signed me up to gymnastics because she thought it would distract me, it helped my grace a lot more and built muscle. My coach had told me that I could've gone to nationals if I hadn't started drugs but hey, life isn't fair. I had snuck out one night and ran into James and Laurent, they offered me alcohol and a couple hits and I agreed because I was tired of all the bull shit. I started hanging out with them a little more. I did a little cocaine one night and accidentally got a tattoo. I actually liked it, so I got a couple more. Renee got pissed off and told me that I wasn't setting a good example for Jane and I told her to fuck off. Things started getting worst after Charlie died, I started giving out attitude in class. I got in a fist fight with a chick because she called me a slut. I started playing pranks around the school, like placing glue on all the teachers chairs and graffiti the cafeteria wall. I got to know the principal by first name. Terrance never knew what hit him, especially when I started dressing better..I had actually achieve style. I had also gotten into cars lately and started purchasing old models and fixing them up. I placed them into Charlie's 7 car garage in Forks.

I had just finished my bottle of Jack and told the boys I was leaving.  
''C'mon Bells, you can take a little more!'' I smiled.  
''Yea James. If I take any fucking more, I'll piss myself and Laurent will get scared for life.'' Laurent raised an eyebrow and pointed to the scare that he glass had left to the top right of my cheek. I laughed and walked to Renee's Audi, it wasn't the best of cars but I wasn't going to use mine.

I turned on the car on and pulled out onto the street. I turned on the radio and turned around to grab my ipod. My vision started blurring and I rubbed my eyes. Once I reached my ipod, I turned back around to be met by headlights; I grabbed the wheel and swerved out of the way but ran into a tree.  
''FUCK!'' I climbed out of the car and kicked the wheel. I looked around and sighed pulling out my cell phone. I dialled Renee's number and heard her pick up on the 4th ring.  
''Hey mom.'' She sighed.  
''Bella! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? Wait! Better question, what did you do?'' I laughed and kicked the car tire.  
''Oh, Renee calm down! All I did was run your car into a tree by accident. Geez'' She gasped.  
''You're high aren't you? What's wrong with you Bella? I'm coming by right now.''  
''Okay, Big Mama. You do that.''  
''BELLA? I can't believe you. I've had enough. You know what. You're no longer accepted to our house. I want you to move to Forks in the morning. I can't take this anymore. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?''  
''Shhhh, grumpy. You'll wake up the other fucking 6 dwarves.'' I laughed.  
''That's it Bella. You're going to Forks tomorrow.'' She hung up.

I had sat down and sobered up enough to realise what she had said and couldn't help but take it out on the car. **  
**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Here I was, in Forks. After Renee came to pick me up last night, she packed up all my stuff and sent me off to the airport. I was stoned off my ass so didn't really care and was nursing a hang over right now. She would send me monthly checks until I turned eighteen, when I could start using Charlie's money. I would move into his house and live there for the rest of my senior year. She had already signed me up to school and I started tomorrow. Joy.

I got of the plane and headed to get a cab, it only took a couple minutes but it took forever getting my luggage in. I had called ahead and asked the shipping company to send over my McLaren F1 in the next couple of days. It was my baby and I barely ever drove without it, unless I was getting high. I had arrived to Charlie's house and took it in. It was a 3-floor house with 3 bedrooms and two bathrooms. He had a pool put in and I had built the 7-car garage on the side. I sighed and walked up the steps. I opened the door to find everything the way it was when I left. The furniture was a little tacky but nothing too bad. I walked up the stairs to the rooms and deposited my stuff in the master bedroom. I turned to my old room that was blank. It was empty and white. I could use this as a studio I guess. I had a passion for painting and music. I walked to the third room and opened up a guest bedroom, that could stay that way. I deposited all of my stuff in the bathroom and went downstairs; the kitchen was stocked with utensils and cooking wear but no food. I huffed and walked out the door to the garage to check on my cars. I currently was working on a beat up Ford that I had bought from a guy in Seattle, I needed to add a new paint jobs and change some valves cables and get a new battery. I touched the paint and turned to look at the rest of my cars. My inventory went from a 65 Impala Coupe to a 72 Charger SE. I hopped into my blue 67 Firebird and pulled out of the garage.

When I arrived to the grocery store, I swear everyone must of stopped and stared at my car and me. I walked into the store and grabbed a basket. Once I got all my needs, I headed over to the cash where a lanky boy was working. The badge on his shirt said he was Eric.  
''Hey, are you knew here?''  
''No, I've just been invisible for 5 years.'' I rolled my eyes and handed him two fifty dollars bills and took my grocery bags and rushed out.

When I got home, I put everything away and heard the doorbell ring. I looked around and went to the door. In the door stood a delivery man with a truck load of packages.  
''Isabella Swan?'' I nodded. ''We've got 24 packages for you. Where do you want them to go?'' Yes, my canvases and instruments had arrived.  
''You can bring them up to the second floor. I'll open the door to the room which they go in.'' He nodded and turned around to go grab a couple of them.

Once he finished he came over to me and eyed my chest. I pointed up to my face and shook my head.  
''Are you all done?''  
''Yes. So what are all those things?'' I chuckled.  
''They're my paintings and instruments. Why the fuck do you care?'' He seemed shocked but answered anyway.  
''Oh. Sorry, I was just curious.'' I nodded towards the door and closed it after he left. I sighed and looked at the clock. 7:15.

I cooked myself a dinner and washed the dishes once I realized the dishwasher didn't work anymore. After that, I took a shower and started placing my CD's into a shelf in my studio and placed my books in my shelves in my room. Unpacked all my clothing and placed all my paintings and blank canvases in the studio with the stands. I went downstairs and checked out the Alcohol cabinets, glad that it was stocked. I poured myself a glass of gin and sat down in front of the television.

I was scared of what tomorrow held. I would see _them _again and didn't know how I would react. I mean, how they would react too because I looked completely different. I looked down and my vine tattoo on my ankle and the cuts on my wrists. They were memories of the things that happened. Vines because the incident would always grasp onto me, stick with me. I could feel the tears weld up in my eyes and grabbed the bottle of tequila. Nothing made me feel any number. Would they recognize me? Would they still laugh at me? Or ignore me? Did they change? I would learn this all tomorrow.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

I had woken up this morning with a pounding headache thanks to my friend Jack and the tequila. I groaned, rolling out of bed and landing on the floor. I remembered that I was in Forks and groaned again. Today was my first day of school at Forks High. What a fucking joy. I stood up and headed towards the shower, the hot water soothing my muscles and relaxing me. After what felt like forever, I turned off the water and got dressed. The weather seemed cold. I decided to wear a pair of dark skinny jeans, a black baby doll shirt and my leather jacket. I walked downstairs turning off and on lights as I went down. I reached the kitchen and searched through the fridge, nothing appealing me. I decided to have a granola bar. While I was eating, I noticed the time. It was 8:10 and classes started at 8:30. I rushed to the front door, pulling on my converse and running to the garage. I hopped into my blue firebird and pulled out of the garage and onto the street.

The school was easy to find. It was the only place where half of Forks population was on a Wednesday morning. As I pulled into the building, I noticed everyone starring at my car. Hadn't they ever seen a refurbished car or at least a nice car in their lives? I guessed not. All the cars were crap except for a Volvo. I decided to park near the back of the parking lot, it would be easier to escape that way. As I opened my door, I heard gasps near by. I mean seriously? Get real. I walked towards the main building where the office was. I walked into the headed room and went up to the front desk where there sat an old lady. Her nameplate on the desk read Mrs. Cope. I stood there for about a minute, waiting for her to notice me. I coughed really loud and the old hag jumped from her chair.

''I'm terribly sorry. I zone out some times.''

''I'm sure you do.'' She looked taken back by my answer. ''I'm here for my class lists.'' She nodded and rummaged through some papers scattered around her desk.

''You're Isabella I presume.'' I nodded. ''Here are your classes and there's a school map to help you out.'' I smiled and headed out to the hallway. I looked down at my page and read that my first class was English in building 2. I headed towards that direction when blond kid stopped in front of me. I looked up at him at went around him. I could hear him following me. I suddenly stopped making him bump into me.

''Uh, hi.'' He stuttered. ''I'm Mike. Mike Newton.''

''Are you some sort of James bond?'' He looked confused. ''Do you have a point here?'' He still didn't answer so I continued walking. I reached my classroom to find it full except for two seats at the back. The teacher was already at his desk but didn't look up as a walked in. I headed to the empty desk and sat down. Everyone in the classroom was whispering and giving me looks. I huffed.

''All right class. Settled down. Ah, you must be the new student am I correct?'' _No, I've been in your class everyday but you're too blind enough to notice. _I nodded instead of commenting my thoughts. ''Welcome to AP English Isabella. We are reading Shakespeare's Hamlet at the moment. I take it you haven't-''

''I've already read it.'' He seemed surprised.

''Have you answered-''

''Yes.''

''Have you done-''

''Yes.'' His mouthed formed an 'o' shape.

''You can start on our next project. We will be reading Romeo and Jul-''

''Already read.''

''Well, then. I will give you this year's book list and you will tell me which one you haven't read.'' I nodded and he passed me a piece of paper. I overheard one student say 'of course the new kid is a nerd' but ignored it. I didn't need attention or anyone to remember me.

I read through the list and snorted.

''Is there a problem?'' I laughed.

''Yes, I've already read all these during my childhood.'' He looked surprised.

''There isn't much else I can give you-''

''Then if you excuse me, I will leave your class. Maybe a walk around the school will be less boring.'' I didn't let the teacher talk before I headed out. I walked around the school until I found the outside soccer field and sat on the bleachers, taking out a cigarette.

''Fucking habit. I really need to stop.'' I muttered to myself. I put out my cigarette and headed towards my next class when I saw the gym classes come outside. I had math next.

Once I reached my classroom. I noticed that Emmett was in my classroom and I got nervous. What if he remembered me? What if he started making fun of me again. Or he could beat me up; I mean he grew a ton of muscles during the years I went away. I sat down at the back of class and tried to pay attention. I wasn't that good at math and I used to skip math class in Phoenix to smoke a joint or two.

Once class was over, it was lunchtime. I saw a group of girls come my way when I put my books into my locker. They looked like a real bunch of skanks. Do you really wear mini dresses to school with your ass hanging out?

''Hi, I'm Lauren and this is Jessica and Monique. Do you want to sit with us at lunch?'' I looked them up and scoffed.

''I'd rather not sit with sluts. Who knows if you have a disease spreadable through touch? And I'd rather keep my appetite.'' Lauren glared at me.

''Listen you fugly new chick. I'm the head cheerleader here and no one messes with me.''

''Oh, I'm sorry. Did I mix you up with a bible banger? Can you not say the word fuck? Cause I swear a slut like you would at least know how to scream it.'' I turned around and heard her scream at people to get out of her way. It seems we drew up a crowd. I walked towards the cafeteria and grabbed a bottle of pop and a poutine. I found an empty table near the window and sat down facing it. I heard more whispers about me and decided to leave. After finishing my food, I turned to the cafeteria doors and slammed them open. Everyone sat still until I slammed them closed. I found staircases that lead to a second floor; clearly no one used this one. So I sat down and rested my back against the wall. I could faintly hear two people walking down the hallway at the bottom of the stairs and decided to eavesdrop.

''Did you see the new chick? I tell you, if I wasn't dating Rosalie I'd have jumped her.''

''Yes, I did. And don't let Rosalie let you hear you say that Emmett.'' My whole entire body froze as I realized whom it was.

The bell went off and I scurried down and towards my biology class. I made it in time for once and went up to the teacher. I introduced myself and he pointed towards the back of the class at an empty table. I sighed contently and sat down, glad to be alone.

''All right class. Today we will be doing a lab on chemistry. You will-'' He was cut off by the door opening, revealing Edward Cullen. The devil himself. ''Ah, Mr. Cullen, it's so nice of you to finally join us.''

''I'm sorry sir, my sister's locker wouldn't open and I needed to help her.'' I looked down the whole time he was talking. I heard the chair beside me scrape against the floor and froze. Damn it, now I needed to work with him. The teacher continued the lesson.

''Hello, I'm Edward Cullen.'' He said to me while holding out his hand. I froze again and looked forward.

''I know.'' He seemed confused by my answer but didn't have time to speak since Mr. Varner interrupted him.

''You two will start on the lab?'' He turned to me then. ''Have you done this lab before?'' I nodded. ''Then you will have no trouble doing it again. You will need to take off your jacket, security reasons while doing labs.'' I nodded again but froze. I was never nervous showing off my cuts but now that I was showing them to the guy who caused them, I was. I sighed and took of my jacket, making sure that he couldn't see them yet.

''So you've done this lab before then?'' He hesitated with a name.

''Isabella and yes I have.''

''Oh, okay. Will you pass me those.'' He said pointing to the measurement cups. I reached forward and grabbed them passing them to him. I heard him gasp and guessed that he had seen my cuts. I looked up at him to see him with a worried expression.

''What have you never seen a fucking cut before? Sure I was suicidal but I don't need your fucking pity.'' He looked away with a guilty look before turning back to me.

''Would you mind if I asked you why?''

''Why?'' I laughed. He didn't know he was the reason why. ''Bullying. That's why.'' If he looked guilty before, he was swimming in guilt now.

''I'm sorry.'' I froze. Did he know who I was? ''People shouldn't be put through that.'' I snorted and laughed. Who was he to talk like that? ''So, Isabella. What's your last name? Since you obviously now who I am.''

''I know what you are and you don't need to remember who I am.'' The bell rang and I left him as confused as ever. I had gym class next and I didn't feel like it, so I walked to my car and left to go home, hoping that he wouldn't remember.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

As I got home, I couldn't stop thinking about what he said. _No one should go through that. _Does that mean he regrets it? Does that mean he's sorry for it? Probably not, I doubt he's changed at all. What would he say if he realizes that I'm Jelly Belly? Well used to be. I wonder what everyone would say. He's such a dickhead though, I mean hypocrite much? Well, of course he doesn't know that I know what he's done, key word ''I know WHAT you are'. Wonder if he'll be smart enough to realize that. Dickhead. Thinking of this gave me an idea. I already told him that I knew what he was, and he doesn't.

It was around 8 o'clock at night when I went to the store and bought some spray paint. I had gotten a lot of different colors, I mean you need some when your making a master piece. I jumped into my impala coupe and rode towards the school. The cafeteria wall would be perfect, everyone would see it and I would leave a message to clue in that it's for him. I walked towards the building spotting an open window. All the lights were off, so I was guessing that no one was there. Perfect. I climbed through the window with my paint and my friend Jack. He always helped me cool down and focus. I found my way to the cafeteria easily. I mean, it's the center of the building. Who wouldn't realize that?

I dropped my stuff to the floor and started sketching. I drew his body, dressed like he was yesterday. Except the catch was that his head was a dick. Dick-head. It would be perfect. After using up all most all of my paint, the mural was huge, I wrote down my message. An arrow pointing towards the head was followed by the words 'this is what you are'. Proud of myself, I cleaned up my mess and grabbed my stuff, finishing off my bottle of alcohol and throwing it in a trash can.

Once I reached my car, I climbed in and sped off towards my house. It was around 11 o'clock now and I was tired. After having a midnight snack, I went to bed wondering what his reaction would be.

----------------------------------------------

I woke up with a small headache and climbed out of bed, searching for some Advil or Tylenol. Once I found them, I made my way to my closet to pick out my clothing. I decided I would wear black skinny jeans with a purple tank and my leather jacket. I picked my jimmy choo's to go with them, feeling all bad ass for the day. Just like yesterday, I ate only a granola bar and headed out to school. Once I arrived, I noticed everyone was walking towards the main building. I could see the principal walking around with a pissed off look on his face. As I walked towards my locker, the slut gang were walking towards me. Without looking away from my locker, I spoke.  
''Do you need help finding a penis? Or is it a bible today?'' I heard Lauren clack her tong on the top of her mouth.  
''We were like going to come and like forget what happened like yesterday and invite you to like join our group but forget about it now.''  
''Done.''  
''What?'' She asked.  
''Do you need a dictionary too? Cause you need to learn what certain words mean.'' She huffed and came right up to my face.  
''Listen here, I like control this school. No one talks trash to like me.''  
''Of course they don't, you're already walking trash all by yourself. Don't need anyone to add to it.'' She seemed about ready to slap me.  
''I'm like warning you Isabella.'' She spoke before turning around and walking away.  
''Oooh, I'm so fucking scared. A bible banging slut is threatening me!'' I screamed after her.

I couldn't wait for lunch to come around and once it did, I was ecstatic. Edward just seemed to stare at it with a pissed off expression. I was full out laughing when a girl that looked like a pixie came up to me. She confused me, did she really want to be near me?  
''Hi, I'm Alice Cullen!'' She thrust he hand in front of my face.  
''Wait, Cullen? Last time I checked there were only two Cullen's.'' She seemed surprised at first but smiled.  
''There was, I was adopted by Carlisle and Esme two years ago. So what's your name?''  
''Oh, um Bella Swan.'' I said without realizing it.  
''What a pretty name! Are you new here.'' I snorted.  
''You could say that.'' She looked very confused but she smiled again and started bouncing up and down. It was starting to freak me out.  
''I love your shoes! Where did you buy them?''  
''I don't care, nor do I remember. I was most likely drunk or high. Whichever you choose.'' Her smile faded.  
''Why would you do those things?'' She seemed so innocent.  
''Because, it was a way to escape.''

''Escape what? I don't think it's escaping, really.'' I rolled my eyes and thanked the devil that the bell rang. ''Oh, well. Toodles!'' She waved before bouncing off to god knows where.  
''Who the fuck says toodles?'' I whispered to myself.

As I walked to biology, I couldn't help but feel nervous. What if he got mad and made fun of me or hit me for doing such a thing to him? Oh well, James taught me a killer hook. I entered the classroom to find everyone whispering and Edward looking at me with a glare. I sat down at my chair and looked forward. He poked my shoulder and I turned to him.  
''What?'' I asked.  
''What? WHAT! You paint a picture of me like that?'' He almost screamed.  
''Oh, you figured it out. Well, what's wrong with it? Did you not like it? I thought it was pretty genius, if you understand what it meant.'' He huffed.  
''You don't know me! So what on earth possesses you do think such a thing about me?'' I almost screamed everything right there.  
''I know more than you think.'' I murmured under my breath.  
''What did you say?'' He asked coldly.  
''I said, it's a free country. I can do what the fuck I want.''  
''You're such a bitch. You're parents should be ashamed of you'' I froze as a remembered when he had last told me that.

_Flashback:_

_I was sitting at the cafeteria, eating some ice cream when all of a sudden I felt something on the top of my head. I was so angry, that for the first time I stood up for myself.  
''What the hell is your problem?'' I screamed. Emmett was laughing and Edward had stopped when he heard me speak up.  
''Everyone's problem is you. Even your parents! They should be ashamed of you, ashamed that they gave birth to such an ugly loser.''  
''Nice one Edward.'' Said Emmett while patting him on the back. I had started to cry and Emmett noticed.  
''Is Baby Bella going to go cry to mommy?'' By now everyone around us had started laughing at me. And I ran as usual to the washroom, balling my eyes out._

End Flashback

I didn't move, I didn't speak. I could only replay that in my head over and over again. Edward was sitting beside me with a curious look on his face. I had enough, I couldn't stand being here. I raised my hand and got Mr. Varner's attention.  
''Yes, Miss Swan?'' He asked rudely.  
''May I be excused from class, I don't feel well.'' He nodded his head and all but bolted out of the classroom. I ran to the washroom. My heart and head pounding in pain. I could remember those memories over and over again and just wanted it to stop. I pulled out a razor from my back, my just in case razors and pulled up my jacket sleeve. I dug the blade into a previous cut so I would feel the sting. It felt good. I washed off the razor and placed in my bag then grabbed some toilet paper. I heard the door open and someone gasp. I turned to see Alice standing there starring at my wrist.  
''Are you okay?'' She asked timidly.  
''I'm fine now.'' She seemed on the verge of tears.  
''Wh-why would you do that? What you make you do such a thing?'' I laughed, soaking the blood up with the toilet paper.  
''Like I said, I do stuff to forget the pain, to escape the memories.'' She came over to me and lifted my other sleeve. She gasped again when she noticed the other scars.  
''How man-many do you have?'' I looked her in the eye to see a worried expression.  
''Oh, don't worry. I stopped being suicidal a couple years ago. These are just to get away from emotional pain. I have 58 in total, the amount of stuff I'd like to forget.'' She hugged me, which was the last thing I expected her to do.  
''You shouldn't do that! You could die accidentally. Don't you care if you die? Think of you parents.'' I snorted.  
''My dad died when I was around 14 and my fucking mother could care less. She's the reason why I have to relive hell everyday here. Now, if you excuse me. I need to get to gym class.'' She moved out of my way after warning me that I shouldn't do these things.

I bandaged up my cut while changing for gym class and pulled on the long sleeve gym shirt so no one would bother me about it. Gym was alright. My coordination was average now instead but the worse was that Emmett was in my gym class. I caught him starring at me a couple times, as if he was searching something about me. When gym ended I got changed and pulled on my clothing. I pulled up the sleeves on my jacket because I was boiling hot, not caring anymore about my cuts. People would only see my bandage.

As I walked to my car, that was parked a few cars down from Edward's car (which I had learnt was the Volvo.) I over heard Alice saying my name to him. I looked up a minute later when no one had spoken and saw Edward starring at me with a mix of guilt, sadness and pain in his eyes. I opened my car door and stepped him, noticing that he saw my bandage with blood leaking through. _  
_


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5(Edward)**

When I walked into school this morning, everyone was crowding around the main building. I could hear the whispers about something happening. I looked around trying to find a way in and excused my self to people once I made it through. I ran into Jasper on the way to the cafeteria.  
''Hey! Edward, did you see what happened in the cafeteria?'' I shook my head no. ''Well, come check it out! It's hilarious. Props to whoever had the balls to do even though I don't get the message.'' I shot a confused look at him.  
''What message?''  
''You'll see.'' He pulled me by the arm through the threshold of the cafeteria and directed me to one of the walls. I gasped at the image. There painted was a guy with a dick as a head with the words 'this is what you are'. I kept starring at it, not really getting the point. ''Hey man, the dude kind of looks like you, I mean weren't you wearing that yesterday?''

It clicked in there. It was a painting of me as a dickhead. Who one earth would do that. _I know what you are. _The words of the new girl ran through my mind. Is that was she thinks of me? She doesn't even know me! What a bitch.  
''Yeah, Jasper. It is me.'' He started laughing at me.  
''Oh man. Wait t'il Alice hears about this.'' Ever since Alice came into our family, she's been dating Jasper.

All through out the day, I couldn't stop thinking about the painting and the girl- Isabella. At lunchtime, I saw her glance at the painting and smile. What a bitch. I could feel her eyes on me, clueing in that he painting was indeed I and the message was for me. She thought I was a dickhead. Plain and simple but the question running through my head was why.

Once I reached biology class, I realized that she hadn't arrived yet. To tell you the truth, it worried me that she had tried to kill herself. Why on earth would anyone do that? The cuts seemed old, I'd say she first started about 5 years ago. I waited for her to arrive and the second she did I waited until she turned to look at me. When she finally felt my eyes on her, she turned.  
''What?'' She asked.  
''What? WHAT! You paint a picture of me like that?'' I almost screamed.  
''Oh, you figured it out. Well, what's wrong with it? Did you not like it? I thought it was pretty genius, if you understand what it meant.'' I huffed. Did she really care about what I thought of it? Is she serious?  
''You don't know me! So what on earth possesses you do think such a thing about me?'' I almost screamed again.  
''I know more than you think.'' She murmured clearly not wanting me to hear. Is she stalking something or me? That's just creepy.  
''What did you say?'' I asked.  
''I said, it's a free country. I can do what the fuck I want.'' Oh, she plays that card. Well, I could at least let her know what I think of her.  
''You're such a bitch. You're parents should be ashamed of you'' Once the words came out of my mouth, I immediately regretted them. She had stopped moving and breathing. I waved my hand in front of her face but she didn't budge. She looked so much in pain. I hated myself again; I told myself years ago that wouldn't go back to this level. After Bella had left the school on _that _day, I realized that I was ruining her life. I was a better person than that. Isabella putting her hand up pulled me out of my thoughts.  
''Yes Miss Swan?'' Mr. Varner asked harshly.  
''May I be excused from class, I don't feel good.'' Now I felt like shit. She didn't even wait for an answer from the teacher before grabbing her bags and running out of the classroom, getting away from me.

I couldn't pay attention in class anymore knowing that I hurt another person. Her name seemed familiar somehow but I just couldn't put my finger on it. After class was over, I walked to my locker to find a sad looking Alice.  
''Hey, Ali. What's wrong?'' She sniffed.  
''It's so sad what people do in this world. I can't believe she would do that! I hope I got through to her.'' I was beyond confused at the moment.  
''Who did what? What are you saying Alice?'' She sniffed again.  
''Be-'' She was cut of by the warning bell. ''I'll tell you later.'' I sighed and made my way to music class.

While sitting in class, I couldn't help but thing of whom she was talking about. Benjamin? Nope, Alice said it was a girl. Becca as in Rebecca? Becky? I don't think it could have been either of them, Alice sort of hated them. It seemed pretty serious about what Alice had said to make her cry.

After class was over, I walked towards my car to wait for the rest of us. Emmett came first. He stopped outside the car and leaned against it.  
''Dude, that new girl is weird. She wore a long sleeve gym shirt to gym class when it's warm outside. Don't you find that weird?'' I shook my head. I knew a reason why but it didn't make sense, she was open about her cuts anywhere else. Alice came towards us with the same look on her face.  
''I know why she had the long sleeve on.'' She seemed on the verge of crying.  
''Well, what is it Pixie?'' Alice sighed.  
''It was her that I saw Edward. I had gone to the washroom during 5th period and I found her in the washroom cutting herself. She had so many cuts on both arms and… and she didn't even care that she could die or get an infection if she's not careful!'' I froze as she spoke. It was during 5th that I had spoke to Isabella.

''Do you know why the new girl does it? I mean she must have a reason?'' Emmett said.  
''Her name is Bella. She didn't tell me why but she told me it was to forget or escape something. Whatever it was, it must have been traumatizing.'' My eyes widened.

Bella Swan is the new girl. Bella Swan was the girl I used to pick on during elementary and middle school. I remember the day that I had stepped over the line. We had been playing volleyball in gym class and Emmett had dared me to smash the ball at the person who would be in the center. I was Bella Swan. I was almost sure she would duck, so I did it. What a huge mistake that was. She ended up having glass from her broken classes cut into her skin near her eye. She had needed stitches because of me. But the worse was after school. Emmett and I were walking towards the exit to the parking lot when he started laughing.

''Did you see what I did to her? She's going to have a messed up face for a while.'' I felt guilty but laughed anyway._  
_''I know man. You got her good. Plus, she'll get even fatter when everyone makes fun of her because she'll eat too much comfort food. She's so fat too. She'll be alone one day.'' Emmett said._  
_''Most likely, or she'll become a prostitute because she'll want attention. I heard from Crowley that she gave Newton a blowjob! What a whore!'' We had started laughing even more. But I stopped when I heard rushing footsteps and a sob around the next corner. Emmett was bend over in giggles so I decided to chance a look. Bella Swan was running down the hallway, crying when she tripped. I heard the sharp smack her head made when it hit the ground. She started getting up and I could see the blood running down her face from the re-opened gash and the side of her face that I had cause. She looked up in time to meet my eyes. Never had I felt more like a monster. That look in her eyes that day was enough to make anyone cry and want to kill him or herself. I was going to go apologize when she started running away again.

I looked up to where Alice was looking. Bella was getting into her car, a white bandage around her wrist with blood seeping through it. It all made sense now. She had moved away and must have started cutting maybe months after she left because of me. She had known who I was and described me for a lot less than I actually was. She had run off during biology because I had repeated the same words to her as I had said before. She had cut herself again because she wanted to forget the memories.

As I got into my car, I couldn't help but think that I would make it up to her. I would beg and plead for her to forgive me. I would make sure that she never went through that again because even when we were in middle school. I had a crush on her. I still do, and even though she has changed, I don't care into what. She was Bella Swan, the angel who went through hell because of me. I had only done those things because I thought she would talk to me, I was nervous to talk to her and thought, if she were going to tell me to stop I would've and started to talk to her. The only problem was, she never spoke up except once. Every time she started crying broke my heart. I just wasn't mature enough to realise I was doing the wrong thing.


	6. Chapter 6

**Here is the next chap. Hope you like (yn)**

Chapter 6(Bella)

I knew the second that he gave me that look, the look that he gave me all those years ago, the regret and guilt, that he was going to pity me. I didn't want his fucking pity. Sure he is the cause of my self-hatred; my drug abuse, my cutting but I made those choices. I knew he was going to try and apologize, I knew he was going to ask for forgiveness, that's what everyone does the minute they are faced with fucking guilt.

I raced home, not wanting to stand there anymore. The second I got home, I threw off my jacket and tore off my boots, throwing them anywhere. I ran to my studio knowing I needed to relief some pain, those memories that would haunt me. I stood in my studio, starring at a canvas in front of me, trying to be strong and not give into it. I had painted years ago, it was a painting of myself on the ground, blood flowing down my face mixing with my tears, my body crumbled to the linoleum floor. The next one beside it was his face, the look of guilt and pain etched on his face. I kept starring at them, willing it to have never happened. I could feel the tears running down my face and wasn't anymore ashamed. I was stronger than this. James and Laurent had taken years to make me what I am today.

Looking at the clock on the wall, I realized I had been sitting there for three hours, starring at memories. I stood up and headed for the kitchen. I opened up the alcohol cabinet and grabbed a bottle of tequila. Grabbing my ipod off the shelf, I headed outside towards the garage.

I was going to ignore the whole in my chest by throwing myself into work. Plugging my ipod into the speakers, I opened up the tequila and took a huge sip. I sighed at the burning feeling of alcohol running down my throat. Getting ready, I tied my hair back and popped the hood of my newest conquest and started working.

it might have been hours that I had been drinking and working until I heard a car pull up outside. I stayed rooted at the spot not knowing if it was him. It was a junkie car that rolled up from what I could hear. The engine was old, it made far too much noise for a brand new Volvo. I sighed and continued working. I could head whoever it was ringing the door bell. Soon or later they would realize I wasn't in the house hence the music blaring in the garage. I could finally hear their footsteps hitting the gravel leading up to the garage and the door swing open.  
''Hello?'' Called a deep voice. I sighed and turned off the music with the remote and stood up.  
''Can I help you or do you usually barge into anyone's garage?'' I was pretty drunk about now with a little more than half the tequila bottle gone into my system.  
''Um, sorry. I'm looking for Isabella Swan, do you know who or where she is?'' I laughed.  
''Yes, I do. Why do you care?'' He huffed.  
''Would you mind telling me where she is?'' I looked him over. He was tall, dark skin with short black hair styled into a fohawk and piercing black eyes.  
''Who are you, and what do you want from her?'' He was getting irritated.  
''I'm Jacob Black. She was a childhood friend of mine and her mother called me to check up on her.'' I snorted.  
''She doesn't remember you. And you can call precious bitchy Renee to fuck off. That's all.'' He frowned.  
''Who are you? How could you talk about Renee like that. She seemed really worried.'' I snorted and barked a dry laugh.  
''I, am Isabella fucking Swan. And Renee isn't my mother, she is merely the person who brought me into the hell whole called life.'' I could tell the color was fading from his face.  
''Bella! Is that really you? Are you drunk? What the hell happened to you! This isn't the Bella I know! What have you done to yourself?'' Who the hell is this guy?  
''i'm not sorry but why the hell do you care? I don't remember you. I don't care what you have to say or what you are going to say. Whoever you are, this is me. I have done nothing to myself. Now, stranger, you can leave. Bye.'' He didn't budge. ''Can you leave? I don't need this shit.''  
''You know Charlie would be disappointed in you.'' I gasped and started shaking in anger.  
''You know nothing about Charlie. HOW DARE YOU TALK ABOUT HIM! GET OUT.'' I was digging my nails into my hands to keep me from punching him.  
''This isn't you Bella.'' Jacob said.  
''You. Don't. Know. Me.'' He took a step forward and so did I.  
''Yes, I do.'' I swung my fist forward and hit him in the jaw. He staggered back a little and my hand was throbbing in pain.  
''GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY GOD DAMN HOUSE.'' He looked at me one last time and left.

I turned around and grabbed the bottle of tequila chugging the rest of it. How random is it that a guy that I apparently knew since I was small. Did I? No. I'm 100% sure I do not know him. And he comes here and talks about Charlie! Charlie was the only one who actually cared about me and what I've wanted to do in life. Sure I might be a disappointement but I am trying to get better. I don't want to be someone who's emotionally scarred. I'm going to be going to college or university next year and become a better person.

I sat down and curled up in a ball, my head resting against my new ford truck. My wrist and fingers were killing me. Was he made out of stone? Fuck. God, how stupid could I get. I dug myself a hole and jumped in it. I didn't need this drama. I didn't ask to be bullied when I was younger or to be a freak. Great more self-hatred. I needed to move on.

Sighing, I decided I wouldn't go to school tomorrow. I would stay up all night and give the new truck a new paint job all night.

A/N:

Okay, I know it might be lame for the next couple of chapters but I can't just skip to the good part. So, yes it's going to suck and not make any sense.  
Jacob being there is only going to make Bella hate herself more and Alice will come in more and Edward will be trying.

PS: Jacob is not a good thing because I don't like him. Sorry to Jacob lovers.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7( Bella)**

Giving the truck it's new paint job was easy, stopping myself from my thoughts…not so much. All my life people have made fun of me, disliked me and hurt me. The only person who didn't was my dad, Charlie. He died thinking I hated him and his boring life in Forks. I would never forgive myself for the mistakes I made. I know that I am a fuck up. I had my mother telling me I was a fuck up. I had my gymnastics coach telling me I fucked up. I had Jane telling me as best she can when she's 6 years old that I'm weird and creepy. I had this guy Jacob telling me I was fucking up. I was a fuck up. No other way to say it.

I pondered while I painted the base coat of the truck what my life could've been. If I had moved away and started a clean slate, try to forget everything I could've been in pink leotard throwing my body around on a mattress in front of thousands of people. I wouldn't be up in the middle of the night painting with a most likely broken wrist wrapped in a tenser bandage listening to slum music. I could've been an A student instead of a B student. My mother could love me and I could be the star sister for Jane.

I mentally rolled my eyes at the thought of Jane. She was the devil reincarnated into a little blond six-year-old blue-eyed girl. I remember her telling on me for coming home late if she heard me or if I was smoking weed in my room. Weed. That sounded about good right now. I ran out to the house and into my bedroom looking for some marijuana. I searched through my secret stash ( a vault hidden behind one of my paintings and found nothing. I could feel my throat constricting and my fingers shaking for a fix. I searched through my drawers and found nothing. I ran into the bedroom and wanked open the cabinet. After tossing a few things to the side, I found something even better. GHB. I popped two pills in my mouth and scurried outside. I could see the sun rising which indicated that it was morning.

Once I was in the garage, I could feel myself become a little dizzy and slowed down to grab the counter to steady myself. I started feeling a buzzing sensation that tickled my leg. That's weird. I reached in my pocket and opened up my phone. I didn't check the caller ID but answered anyways.  
''Hello?'' I mumbled.  
''Isabella. Did I wake you?'' I sighed. Only Renee would call this early.  
''Why do you care?'' I growled.  
''I'm guessing I did and I care because I'm your mother.'' She said.  
''You're not my mother bitch. By the way, you didn't wake me. I've been up all night getting hammered. Happy?'' She huffed on the other line.  
''Why are you acting like this? Is Forks not helping.'' I sighed thinking of hanging up, my vision was blurring and I could barely feel my legs. ''You know I was only looking out for you. I do want what's best for you.''  
''You…don't want the best for meee. Youu want it for your purrfect little Janey. You could careless about me bi-''. I could feel my body collapse to the ground. My vision was gone, all I could see was black and I felt a sharp pain at the back of my head.

(**Edward)**

I was going to apologize today. I had figured out last night while listening to some Train that I needed to say everything that was running through my head. The guilt, the anger directed at myself, the sadness, the hurt. Just the look on her face when she saw me that first day of school was heart breaking and then I went and screwed it up by being all 'people shouldn't be put throught that' crap when I was the one who did it to her. And on top of it, there were so many cuts.

I grabbed my keys and pulled on my coat while waiting for Alice to come down. Emmett was on the couch playing some video game. He seemed to be pondering something while playing. Clearly he was distracted.  
''Yo, Emmett. Let's move.'' I shouted to him. He jumped up from the couch and looked at me.  
'Hey Edward?'' He seemed really nervous all of a sudden.  
''Yes Emmett?'' I sighed.

''Doesn't that new chick remind you of someone? I know her from somewhere but I can't put my finger on it.'' I froze and looked at Emmett before shrugging.  
''Emmett! I told you her name is Bella Swan. Jeez.'' Said Alice. Her little foots steps were heard on the wooden stairs. I huffed.  
''Let's go. I don't want to be late to school. Move it.'' Alice rolled her eyes and stepped out the door to the car.

The car ride seemed so quiet today. Alice was in the backseat looking out the window with a sullen expression and Emmett's face was scrunched up in a frown, he wasn't even trying to mess with my stereo system like he usually did. I heard him gasp all of a sudden and his eyes went wide. Alice perked up in the backseat and leaned forward.  
''What's wrong Grizzly?'' She asked.  
''I can't believe it.'' Was the only thing that came out of his mouth. Alice sighed.  
''Can't believe what. Spit it out Emmett!'' She was getting impatient. Emmett turned to me and spoke.  
''The new chick is Bella Swan.'' I huffed.  
''I know she's Bella Swan.'' I rolled my eyes.  
''No, Edward. She's the girl we tormented in middle school. The girl we called Jelly Belly. Bella the Fella. You know, the girl that you broke her glasses at least 20 times and hit her with stuff in gym class. Oh, man. We were such dicks.'' Alice gasped.  
''Edward Cullen pull the car over this instant!'' I followed her instructions and turned the car off. ''I can't believe you! You two are the reason she cut herself. YOU MADE HER WANT TO KILL HERSELF. Emmett, Edward are you happy with yourselves? I can't believe you! You two are assholes. DICKHEADS.'' She gasped again and started laughing. ''She painted that picture of you in the cafeteria didn't she! OH MY GOD. I can't believe you.'' Emmett turned around in his seat.  
''Alice, we are so very sorry. Yes, we are dickheads and assholes and every bad word that is out there.'' I ran my hands through my hair and pinched the bridge of my nose.  
''I was already planning to apologize to her today Alice. I just wanted to get her attention back then and Emmett thought it was funny. We didn't think she'd do that.''I said.  
''Whatever. Let's get to school so you two buffoons can apologize.''

B&EB&EB&EB&EB&EB&EB&EB&EB&EB&EB&E

Once we reached the school I searched the parking lot for Bella. She wasn't there when the bell rang and I got worried. The bell had rung and I had run to class. The day didn't seem to go by very quickly. Emmett was in her math class apparently and she wasn't there. So when lunch came around and she still wasn't there I decided to go to her house and check on her. I would also apologize if she wouldn't slam the door in my face.

I drove to her house already knowing where it was since she lived in Chief Swan's house. She had inherited it I believed. I wondered who lived with her then. Maybe her mother came down with her and they live in the house.

When I pulled up to the house, I was surprised to see a 7-car garage newly built. I didn't expect that. And who other than my family in this town had more than two cars? I decided to ignore my curiosity and walked up to the front door. I knocked a couple times but didn't get an answer. I rang the door bell and got the same thing. I walked around the house before heading to the garage. I could hear faint music being played and a phone indicating a call that's been hung up. It smelt like fresh paint and as soon as I walked in I could see why. Bella had 7 cars, all from different decades and they were in the best condition. I walked through the garage before spotting the phone that was beeping on a counter behind this huge monstrosity. I quickly walked behind the truck and gasped at what I saw.

Bella was on the ground, pasty white with blood coming from her head and her hand bent at and odd angle. Her eyes were closed shut and I was freaking out.  
I picked her up off the ground and ran out to my Volvo. I placed her in the passenger seat for once not caring about getting anything on the leather seats. She was dying who cared if her blood was on my car. I pulled out of her drive way and hit the gas speeding towards the hospital where I new my father would take care of her.


	8. Chapter 8

**It's my birthday! YAY(: I'm officially 15. **

**Chapter 8 (Edward)**

"HELP!" I screamed as i rushed into the hospital. I found an empty room and placed her on the bed.  
"Sir, you have to wait your turn." I was furious. Couldn't she see that Bella was dying?  
"Listen carefully m'am. She's dying, now go and call my dad to come down here." I said.  
''But-".  
''GO GET MY DAMN FATHER. NOW!" I turned to Bella while she called Carlisle down.

She seemed so lifeless lying there on the bed, her face white as snow, her hair coated in her bload. I leaned forward and checked her pulse to put my mind a little at ease. It's was slow which wasn't a good thing. I could hear my father's foot steps coming from the hallway.  
"Edward. What is it son?" I moved out of his line of sight so he could look at Bella. "Edward, press the button on the wall. It will alert nurses. How long ago did you find her?" I could tell he was in doctor mode.  
"I arrived at her house around half an hour ago and found her around twenty minutes ago. I believe she's been like that for more than half the day. I just- when i say her. Carlisle, i hope i'm not too late." He nodded his head and pulled out an IV and checked her blood type.  
''You did good son, i'm going to have to ask you to leave the room now. I'll update you oncewe are done." I nodded and bend down and kissed Bella's forehead.

B&EB&EB&EB&EB&E

I had been waiting in the waiting room for around two hours while they ran tests and brought her up to ICU. Carlisle hadn't left her side yet and didn't have time to update me. No one had filled in her insurance sheets yet because she didn't have a legal guardian since she lived alone. They had no way of contacting her mother either. It scared me to death finding her in that position. I wanted so badly to go and ask her why on earth something like that happened but i couldn't. She hated me, to her i was nothing but a monster.  
"Edward." Carlisle called. I lifted my head up from laying it in my hands and looked at him. His expression was worried and sad.  
"Is she okay? Where is she now?" He placed a hand on my shoulder to calm me down now.  
"She's been moved two floors down from ICU. She has a concution and a broken wrist and a fracture knuckle. She asleep right now, she's doped up on some morphine and has 12 stitches accross the right side of her head." I nodded, taking in all this information.  
"Is that it? Can i go see her?" Her put hishand up again, his expression was grave.  
"We found high levels of alcohol and GHB in her system. It's mostlikely the cause of the fall. Do you know if she's an addict? If she is, it might be best to put her into rehabiliton." I shook my head still processing the information. Did she get drunk because of me? How did she break her hand? Did she take GHB to escape me? Did she try to kill herself?  
"How long will she be here for?" I asked. Carlisle sighed.  
"She wil be kept in the hospital for the next 3 days on suicide watch. Son, do you believe she tried to kill herself?" I was hoping he wouldn't ask me that.  
"I have no idea." He sighed again.  
"She has cuts on her fore arms which show signs of suic-" I stopped him mid sentence.  
"Those are from years ago. She told me and Alice." He nodded and turned around heading towards his office. He was halfway tot he elevator when he turned around.  
"Do you care about her Edward?" I nodded. "Then try and help her son." And he turned back around.

I walked up towards the seventh floor and headed to the nurses station. The nurse at the desk was reading some Comso magazine or something and was ignoring the phone calls coming through the line. I walked up to the desk and stood there waiting for her to notice. When she didn't i coughed loudly. She looked up startled and blushed, placing the magazine down.  
"May i help you" She practically purred. It was revolting.  
"Yes, you could tell me which room Isabella Swan is in." She huffed and mumbled something along the lines of 'good ones taken'.  
"Oh, okay. She's in room 762."I nodded and walked towards her room.

The sight infront of me was heartbreaking, she was hooked up onto an IV drip and had cables poking out of her. The side of her forehead was covered in a gauze, covering the stitches. I imagined they had to pump her stomach to get everything out of her system. She looked so fragile and broken in that hospital bed. She had dark bruises formed underneath her eyes. When was the last time she had slept? Her body was too skinny, i could faintly make out her ribcage through the hospital gown. When had she last ate? I thought back to what Carlisle had told me and i agreed, i would take care of her from now on.

**Bella**

I groaned from the pain radiating off my body. I felt like a train had run me over, and i was alive and mangled. I tried sitting up and opening my eyes. My back and head pulsed from the pain. I sighed and looked around at my surroundings. I was definitely in a hospital but how the fuck did i get here? All i remember was being on the phone with my mom and then falling. Nothing else after. I turned to the sound of breathing to find Edward Cullen sleeping in the chair next to my bed with his face laying side ways on my bed. I huffed and turned to look at my body.  
"Fuck." I had and IV drip in my arm and a cast around my wrist. I could feel the tape holding up gauze on my head and reached up to touch it but wasn't able when my IV tugged. I huffed and came to a conclusion. Edward Cullen had found me, had been on my property and brought me to a hospital. I hated hospitals, i needed to get out of here. I pulledou my IV out and threw the blankets off of me and slid off the bed. I detached the heart monitor and looked around the room for anything better to wear then the hosptial gown. I found my clothing resting on a bench accross the room and moved to it quickly. My head and back ached at the movement and i hissed in pain. I heard a gasp and turned around.  
"What are you doing?" Edward said. I rolled my eyes at his stupidity and continued my mouvements.  
"I'm getting the fuck out of here, what does it look like?" He moved forward and blocked the way infront of me.  
"You can't. You've been put on suicide watch and have to stay here for the next two days." I cocked my head to the side.  
"Watch me pretty boy. Now move." I moved towards the left and he blocked me again.  
"I'm not letting you move. You're in bad shape. You almost went into a coma for godsake! What were you thinking?" I snorted.  
"I obviously wasn't. Now move, i don't care if i was in a coma or not and that wasn't suicide. If i wanted to kill myself i'd go to La Push and jump off the fucking cliffs. Maybe i'll be lucky enough to only crack my neck on a rock on the way down and die a quik death. Now if you don't excuse me, I need to get out of here." He didn't move at all.  
"That isn't funny at all Bella. You shouldn't joke around with your life." I snorted.  
"You shouldn't of made a joke out of people's lives cause trust me that's even worst then death because your practically begging for someone to get it over with and kill you." I say him flinch from my harsh words and smiled.  
"Bella. I've been wanting to tell you this for so long. I am so sorry for everything i put you through. I know that my actions were wrong, i made life hell for you and i could only beg for your forgiveness. I am a monster, I am a dickhead and i deserve far worst than death for doing that to you. I apologize and will regret it ever single day of my live, i am regretting it. I feel so guilty for taking many opportunities out of your life." I was taken back from the tone of his voice and his facial expression. He looked so sad and guilty, i felt a pang in my heart and tried to shake the feeling away.  
"You're forgiven."  
"I know you can never forgive me but- what?" I sighed.  
"You heard me. Now can you move?" He didn't budge.  
"Why do you forgive me so easily? I made life hell for you, you should ne punching me or hiting me!"I looked down and covered my face with my hair.  
"I screwed up my own life. It's my fault that people didn't like me, didn't accept me. I could've stood up to you and i didn't. I ran away and tried to forget it and just managed to screw up my life more." I was embarassed and found myself confused as to why i would tell Edward this.  
"It's not your fault. It's mine. All mine." I laughed.  
"Whatever, can you move?" He shook his head no. "WHY NOT!"  
"You are staying here and healing, if you try and leave i will have the nurses sedate you and strap you to the bed if i have to." I huffed and turned back around towards the bed.  
"Fuck you. I hate hospitals." He smiled and what a smile it was.  
"That's what i thought. Now sleep, you need to get better." I growled at him and tried to punch in the arm but he caught my casted arm and tsk'ed.  
"Why are you doing this anyways? Swimming in your guilt? I'm not a charity case. I'm not going to put your damn soul at ease just so you can goto fucking heaven when you die."  
"Oh Bella. You will never be a charity case or will i be doing this just to put myself at ease.

**WOOT. Another chapter(:  
I hope you like it. I will be writing more because i got a laptop for my birthday(it's a pretty one too xD)  
Have a nice day! I sure am.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9 (Bella)**

"I'm not tired and i'm not going to sleep Edward." He huffed and slid into the chair beside my bed.  
"You'll fall asleep soon, trust me." I snorted and looked down at my wrist. I would have to decorate that, white was too plain. "Can i ask you some questions?" He asked.  
"Knock yourslef out pretty boy, there is nothing else for me to do in the god damn fucking hospital." He chuckled. I could see in my periphial vision that his whole face lit up, it was nice to see.

"How did you hurt yourself? I mean.. your wrist." I snickered but answered anyways.  
"Some guy named Jacob came to my house last night and was all like 'Renee wanted me to check up on you. What are you doing to yourself? Charlie wouldn't be proud' type of shit and i got fed up of telling him to leave so i punched him. I really hope he has a broken nose." Edward nodded but there was a grim expression on his face.  
"Why did you take the GHB? Why did you drink so much?" I sighed, i knew this question was going to come.  
"Do you ever want to escape life, just esape all the drama and the trouble and the stupidity life holds?" He nodded. "Well that's what i wanted to do. I was orignially looking for some weed, i'll have to get some more, but anyways. The only thing icould find was GHB. I didn't look at the dosage because it's either i stay high or i crash. It makes me feel peaceful for once." He leaned over onto my bed and placed his arm on the side of me.  
"Is it because of me that you did those things all those years ago?" I frowned, thinking of exactly what was caused by him but not his fault.  
"I left because of you and your brother. I stopped eating because i was fed up with everyone calling me Jelly Belly. I started cutting myself because of the nightmares." His face became guilty at the mention of this. "My mom signed me up for gymnastics because she thought that it would distract me. It helped my balance i guess. I had snuck out of the house one night because queen bee and her princess were so fucking annoying and eveything had to be perfect. I ran into some guys and they offered me weed. I said yes cause my life was already messed up. I started getting into more drugs and i got so drunk one night that i ended up getting some tattoos. The worst was after Charlie died, i litterally had no one to turn to, no one who thought i was good enough. My principale was surprised and pissed off. Terrance never knew what hit him." Edward was pinching the bridge of his nose, clearly thinking.  
"I'm so sorry, i never-".  
"Would you shut the fuck up with thhe sorry's? It's becoming a pain in the ass." He didn't say anything.  
"What would have happened if you hadn't done all the drugs? Do you ever think of that?" I nodded.  
"Everyday. If i hadn't done drugs i would've gone to nationals for gymnastics. If i hadn't done drugs maybe Charlie would still be alive."  
"What do you mean he would still be alive? It wasn't like it was your fault he died. He was hit by a car and swerved into a tree. He died in the hospital Bella."I shook my head, i could feel the tears brimming my eyes.  
"It was my fault. Renee was on the phone telling him about the drugs and stuff. He wasn't paying attention to the road and ran a red light, he looked up in time to just nearly miss getting hit and he ran into the tree. If i hadn't done the drugs, then Renee wouldn't of called him and he wouldn't of ran the red light. It was all my fault. I'm a fuck up. I'm a murderer." I was sobbing by now, tears running down my face, me gasping for air. I felt Edward move onto my bed and craddle me against him.  
"Shh. Bella, it wasn't your fault. You are not a murderer or a fuck up." I hickuped and wipped the tears off my cheeks. I didn't like being weak infront of people.  
"Sorry."Edward laughed, but once he saw my face he stopped.  
"What do you have to apologize for? Nothing. You're a very nice person." I snorted.  
"I've been nothing but a bitch to you, and you say i'm nice. You're dilusional." He shook his head and continued rocking me.  
"Just sleep Bella, you're emotionally exhausted." I huffed and turned my head towards him.  
"Way to make me sound like a pussy." Edward laughed and tucked me into the hospital bed.

Even though Edward had been my bully, he was making it up to me now. He was a gentlemen, clearly he grew up. He was also good looking, which was hard for me to ignore. I mean who can ignored a fucking greek god that has been sitting in your hospital room for two days? I think i was starting to like this Edward.

**A/N**:  
**Okay, i know the chapter is short. I don't have alot of time today and i apologize.  
I hope you like it thought.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10(Edward)**

She had finally fallen asleep much to the joy of the doctors. I think that one nurse was getting annoyed, and Carlisle was ready to sedate her. I was glad that she had opened up to me and shown me another side of her, granted she was crying and I didn't like that. She looked so broken and the tears, I couldn't handle tears. I could tell that she loved her father very much; he seemed to be the only one who acted like a parent to her. She shouldn't feel bad though, it was purely an accident.  
"What are you thinking so hard about pretty boy?" I was taken aback and jump up out of my seat. Looking upwards, I met an awakened Bella.  
"I was thinking of you." Her brow furrowed and she ducked her head down, but not fast enough that I couldn't see her cheeks tinged red with blush.  
"Realizing that i'm a fuck up?" I shook my head quickly.  
"You aren't and let's not think of that today. How about we play twenty questions?" She laughed and I frowned, did she think it was funny?  
"Alright, you first. I've never been able to think of questions before." It was my turn to chuckle.  
"What's your favourite color? There that's an easy one." She nodded.  
"Green."She answered with a blush, ducking her head. I grabbed her chin and tilted her head back up.  
"Don't hide your face from me please. Now, why is your favourite color green?" She shook her head and smiled.  
"I don't think so pretty boy, it's my turn." I faked a little 'damn' and she laughed. "Um, do you play any instruments?" It was an odd first question.  
"I know this is dorky but I play the piano."She didn't laugh at me like other people instead she grabbed my hand.

"I think that's wonderful, secretly I've always wanted to play." She squeezed my hand and then dropped it. I whimpered at the loss and sighed.  
"Why are you living alone in Forks?" She rolled her eyes and muttered something like 'the bitch'.  
"Because I ran Renee's into a tree the night before I moved here while I and drunk. She got pissed off and was like your aren't showing Jane anything good. Blah blah blah. I told her to fuck off and she told me to move. Technically, I own that house. . So whatever." I was confused, was Renee her mother?  
"Is Renee your mother?" She laughed.  
"No. She's the one who gave birth to me. She's the mother to the spawn of Satan. "It seemed like an inside joke to her so I wasn't going to ask anything about it. Her mother sounded like a fluke, someone who didn't care very much for Bella.  
"So you own the house? What do you mean technically?" She sat back against the hospital pillows and looked at me.  
"When Charlie died, he left everything to me. Me being his only relative still alive. I get his pension pay, the insurance money and the rest of my inheritance when I turn 18." It made more sense now, but she was still on her own without any surveillance. She could basically do anything she wanted. She had what most people our age wanted. To be on our own, without parental supervision.  
"That's cool. So, when do you turn 18? What do you plan on doing?" A look of complete devastation crossed her features and I wanted that smile to return right away.  
"My birthday doesn't matter, I don't celebrate it. I plan on going to university as an art major." That made sense as well; I had only seen one of her art pieces and let me tell you, it looked like me... Well except the dick as a head part...  
"What do you mean your birthday doesn't matter? It does. So when is it?" She shook her head and bit her lip.  
"I'm not telling you, i'm not telling anyone. For the past two years, I usually just get really drunk and pass out on the bathroom floor after saying happy fucking birthday bitch to myself before midnight." It seemed like the most depressing birthday. I mean, this was her 18th birthday for crying out loud. Usually you would want to go out to a club and party it up while consuming alcohol legally for the first time.  
"Will you give me a hint?" She shook her head. "Please? I won't throw a party!" She huffed and slit down the mountain of pillows behind her.  
"Fine, it's in the next month. And why do you want to know if you're not going to do something?" She frowned.  
"I never said I wouldn't do anything. I will be bringing you a gift for everyday in the next month and all I ask is that on the last day while I make you dinner that you tell me what day your birthday was on." I could tell she didn't like that idea, but I had allot to make up for and this seemed like the perfect opportunity, especially since it would make up for her lack of gifts last year too.  
"YOU WILL DO-" She was cut off by the door opening and a nurse walking in.  
"Good afternoon Miss Swan, your discharge papers have been filled in and signed. You can leave now." It didn't escape me that the last part was very hostile. Bella got up off the bed and went towards the pile of clothing on the chair in the corner that was hers. She picked something up off the pile and groaned. I heard a cell phone ring and Bella answered hers.  
''What do you want Renee?" I could hear the squeaking of the other person's voice on the phone.  
"I chose not to tell you. Why? Because you chose to have me stalked." There was a pause before Bella spoke again. "I don't care and neither should you. Screw the fact that it's my health. Yes there were drugs. No shit bitch. I'll call you what you are. Bye Renee." She hung up quickly and walked towards the bathroom, the whole time with her head down.  
"Do you want me to wait outside?" She looked up, her eyes dead of light.  
"You don't have to wait for me, sorry for taking up your time. If you want to go home, i don't blame you." I was flabbergasted. What had her 'mother' told her to put her in this mood?  
"I'm here if you ever need me Bella, please don't forget that. Now, i will wait outside so i can drive you back to your house."She nodded before stepping into the washroom.

A/N:

**Alriiiiight.  
So, i will be posting up another story later on tonight..  
Return will be updated every Sunday. And my next story will be updated every Thursday.  
The new story's name is Hostage.  
Look for it later tonight.**


	11. SOS! HELP!

This is really getting frustrating.  
I can't think of anything for this story's story line.  
Could you guy s give me ideas?  
I HAVE MAJOR WRITER'S BLOCK.  
I apologize since i've been taking so long for this fanfiction.  
PLEASE SEND ME IDEAS.  
I beg you.  
-Gabrielle.


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